My 2024 in Review: Hopeful
As another year comes to a close, it's a perfect time to pause, reflect, and actually blog for a change. It’s been an eventful year on so many levels and while it might be easy to look back and think of some of the awful things we’ve gone through, I want to take a moment and describe 2024 in one word: hopeful.
My Word of the Year: Hopeful
Without a doubt, 2024 was one of the most difficult years in recent memory for Lebanon and the Lebanese people. With full-blown terrorist attacks on the South escalating over the last few months between Israel and Hezbollah, over 3 thousand dead and 14 thousand injured and a collapsing economy, I can’t think of anyone more resilient than Lebanese people.
It’s a double-edged sword: most of the time, we don’t want to be resilient anymore. We just want to live, party, smoke hookah and drink coffee with our moms and aunts and gay friends. But if there was a time to be strong and durable, 2024 was the year.
I watched the events of the war on Lebanon from over five thousand miles away, but my heart and mind couldn’t have been more than ten feet away. It was surreal; waking up, going to work and typing on my little computer like people I knew and cared about weren’t glued to their TVs, waiting to find out when or how they should leave their homes should the terrorists attack again. Meetings about backlogs and software bugs took place as world leaders celebrated bombing children and journalists. I felt numb.
People often don’t know what to say to you when your country is at war. I appreciate every “sorry this is happening, I’m here for you if you need anything, and it sucks what’s happening out there” because I know they are well-intentioned. But I appreciate the honest questions even more–the “I don’t know what to say”, the “I don’t know much about the conflict” and the “tell me more”s. These sparked conversations I didn’t know I needed. From talking about the complicated history of Lebanon–from our civil war where Muslims and Christians were pinned against each other to every regional war we’ve had since then, the French colonization, the Syrian regime taking over our country, the 2006 war with Israel, ISIS and so much more. Looking back at all of these quintessential moments in Lebanese history brought me, among every other feeling, hope.
With the defeat of Hezbollah, most notably their leader, the Assad regime in Syria falling apart and a ceasefire looming on the horizon, I see plenty of room for hope in my country. I doubt we will ever live in a world where someone doesn’t want to take over Lebanon in some way or another, but I finally see some light at the end of the tunnel–sort of. The economy hasn't recovered–I used to buy a manousheh za’atar back in my day for $1 which was 1,500 Lebanese pounds, which is now worth more than 89,000 Lebanese pounds. But tourism continues to pull the country together, promising a future in which I and many expats can return home.
If there was another word to describe my 2024, it would indeed be “home”.
Home
The concept of home has always been fascinating to me. Born in the States and lived in Lebanon from the ages of 3 to 23, I’ve found myself having multiple homes over the years. At the same time, the word “home” is conditional on who I’m talking to.
I’m from Lebanon if I’m in Boston, but I’m from Pennsylvania if the conversation is about where you’re born.
I’m from Boston if I’m in Texas, but I’m originally from Lebanon.
I’m from Akkar if I’m in Tripoli, Lebanon but I’m from North Lebanon if I’m in Beirut. (Complicated)
I’m from Beirut if you want to know where I went to college, but I’m from Zouk Mosbeh if you actually know where that is.
And then there’s a different kind of home, one that I found four years ago at a time where hope was almost lost. I got married in August of this year; it was stressful and beautiful and cozy and lovely, but among everything else it was just right. I talked about “being home” in my vows to my husband and he joked about kidnapping me. He cried and it was a moment I will never forget: a snapshot etched in my memory forever, as if the photograph lives rent-free.
We’re ending 2024 with a new home, too. Our current place is lovely and spacious, but not close enough to where the rest of our home is: our friends and found family. So 2024 is ending with boxes all over, items we didn’t realize we needed which are now packed somewhere, lost until early January, and lots and lots of money being spent on the new place.
On Writing and Stuff
I wrote more in 2024 than I ever have my entire life. It’s a feat I’m incredibly proud of and can’t wait to share more of my writing with the rest of the world soon. Here’s a quick breakdown:
Started this website where I plan to blog more, write short stories and share updates on the gay, Arab fantasy stories I’m writing
Finished Draft 1 of The Whispering Sands (or title TBD). This is something I started two years ago as a NaNo project and it’s my proudest writing creation yet: a high-fantasy, gay, Arab story about found families, the Lebanese myth “Mother of Thunder” and lots of gay shit. This draft is a little over 60k words for now and it’s entering the Editing Phase in January. I plan on sending it out to beta readers (and friends!) soon, so reach out if you’re interested!
Finished Draft 1 of Untitled Sci-fi. I’m not sure where I’m landing with this one, but it’s the gay Arab sci-fi novel of my dreams. It needs a whole lot of editing, but I’m working with a writing mentor on fixing it up in 2025.
In 2025, I want to write more. I want to query The Whispering Sands and work on something new. My head is never not coming up with new ideas and stories that are begging to be told. As obnoxious as this might sound, I feel like the world needs to read gay Arab stories–mine included.
On TV and Movies
I loved Silo, Apple TV’s sci-fi adaptation of the post-apocalyptic novels with the same name. It’s a fantastic slow-burn mashup of sci-fi, thriller and action, and Rebecca Ferguson is beyond phenomenal. I know some fans are arguing over Season 2, but I am personally enjoying it just as much as the first and will be saddened once the season is over.
I still watch Ghosts (US) and Grey’s Anatomy, both of which I enjoy a lot.
I watched Love is Blind Habibi and it’s ridiculously fun and stupid.
Agatha All Along didn’t quite land with me like WandaVision did, but it was still a 2024 highlight without a doubt.
High Potential, Kevin Can F Himself and Fallout were the biggest surprises for me. Absolutely adore all three shows for very different reasons.
This is the fourth year in a row where I have become less and less invested in watching movies, but Wicked is undoubtedly the highlight of 2024 for me. I also usually end the year with some holiday movies and realized just how perfect The Holiday (2006) is from start to finish.
Video Games
My favorite video game of the year would have to be Astro Bot. I think the world needs more 3D platformers and no game in recent memory brought me more joy than Astro did. Here’s hoping this lights a fire in Nintedo’s ass to give us a giant, open-world 3D Mario game with the Switch 2.
Dungeons of Hinterberg struck a chord with me in a way no video game ever has. It reminded me of Lebanon and checked all of my boxes: 3D, puzzles, platforming and stylized.
I replayed Immortals Fenyx Rising and it continues to be my favorite game of all time. Just perfect.
I’ve been playing a lot of Infinity Nikki lately and enjoying the hell out of this cute open world cozy game. I may not be as invested in the outfits and the styling challenges as (probably) everyone else is, but I’m loving the platforming challenges, mini-games, the exploration and so much more. It’s even free-to-play if you ignore all the gacha elements!
I’m so excited for Eternal Strands, which comes out in January. It feels like a spiritual successor of Immortals Fenyx Rising and I cannot wait.
I stopped making TikToks and Reels about video games in 2024. It was no longer “fun” and felt more like a chore than I ever want video games to feel. In fact, I stopped using TikTok altogether and I haven’t felt any need to go back ever since. I will continue to talk about Arab and queer representation in video games (or lack thereof, especially for the former) in other avenues such as community events (Boston Gaymers), convention panels and more. Stay tuned!
Here’s to more hope and home for 2025 and beyond!
Thank you for reading <3
